‘Sometimes I wish I was someone else.’
Bob, having finally got Edna to talk about herself, hesitated then asked: ‘Do you feel…?’
‘Unwanted?’
They were in a pub in Peckham, both sipping warm beer, the nineteen-fifties three days from ending.
‘The next decade’s going to be better,’ Bob said. ‘Attitudes are going to change.’
Her account had opened his eyes. A woman called Ivy gets pregnant ‘out of wedlock’ at seventeen, then dies giving birth. Her infant, Edna, survives and Ivy’s mother ‘takes mercy’ on the orphan, bringing her up in a chill house where resentment rattles its walls, and reluctance blows on its roof slates. The orphan grandchild is blamed for her mother’s ‘mistake’ and death, and is daily force fed ‘gratitude’.
Edna sipped her alcohol self-consciously, as though being judged. In the stockbroker’s office where they both worked, she sat at her typewriter in similar uneasy fashion. It was their first date, perhaps her first glass of alcohol
‘If you could have one thing,’ Bob asked, ‘what would it be?’
Her hand went to her mouth self-protectively. ‘I don’t know.’
Joy, he thought. That’s what she’d like but she doesn’t feel worthy of it.
/
I woke up just as my waters broke. Bob rang the midwife who said she’d come soon. Next thing I’m getting mild contractions as I prepare a casserole for the evening meal for the two of us. The contractions become stronger, I lay down in the bedroom, call Bob. The baby’s head appears as the midwife knocks. Bob refuses to leave me, despite the midwife asking him to. Another push, the rest of my daughter arrives, and not long after the placenta. I didn’t need stitches or painkillers, and Bob held my hand. I cradled the baby and thought of my mum, the life we might have had.
/
One day, when our three children had grown and left home, Bob looked round the garden of our new house, and said, ‘Do you remember our first date, you said, “If I ever get a home of my own…” ’
‘ “…Everybody can come to it.” ’
‘Honestly, your gran! Wouldn’t let you have schoolfriends round, though they invited you to theirs.’
‘I still mean it, Bob. I’ll help any child I can.’
‘I’ve got an idea, Edna.’
/
Edna Johnston, growing up orphaned, made a vow to be there for other kiddies. Today marks twenty years of opening her picturesque garden to youngsters. Edna, 82, who retired to the coast from London, started Whitstable Open Gardens in 2006. Dozens of local gardens participate in the scheme. The annual event has now raised over £100,000 for the Children’s Society.
‘We’ve had five hundred people this weekend in our garden alone,’ she said. There’s a waterfall, pond, mini-woodland, allotment, bird sanctuary. I love seeing the children’s pleasure.’
‘Their joy,’ added Edna’s doting husband, Bob.
Every child welcome! The once lonely toddler now has heaps of small friends! A big-hearted lady!
Emily Lufton, Kent Online News
