He swept into the room as if he owned it; every head turning as he strode across the parquet flooring, his heels clicking. Even Queen Elowen Lumina looked up from the sheaf of demands she was studying.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cThis is,\u201d she started to say, \u2018this is a meeting of the Royal Council to which only members and invited guests can attend.\u2019<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n But then he pulled back his hood, and recognition spread across her face. \u201cOh, Inspector Ironbell, I hadn\u2019t expected to see you.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cMa\u2019am,\u201d Inspector Camden Ironbell kneeled at her side and took her hand. \u201cI believe you have a problem.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n \u201cIronbell?\u201d Nathaniel Clarke, the court lawyer, gasped, slapping his hands on the tabletop. \u201cTHE Inspector Ironbell?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cI have that honour,\u201d Ironbell responded. \u201cTo whom am I speaking?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cI am, Nathaniel Clarke, Chief Liar to the Court.\u201d Clarke bowed his head slightly.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cLiar?\u201d Ironbell queried.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cYe-es,\u201d Clarke pursed his lips. \u201cI\u2019m a lawyer. But suffice to say the public voted on our titles.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cI understand. Never let the public loose on anything without controlling the options,\u201d opined Ironbell. His eyes settled on Hua Jin.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cJin, Hua Jin,\u201d she said, lighting a cigarette. She pushed a biscuit tin towards him. \u201cYou wan\u2019 a sweet and sour Cherry Bakewell?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n Ironbell sat next to a priest who had not spoken so far. He held out his hand. \u201cFather Alaric. I represent the spiritual dimension of the kingdom.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cNot for the Confucians, you don\u2019t,\u201d snapped Jin. \u201cThey can\u2019t stand you.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cThere is only one Confucian, madame,\u201d the portly priest retorted.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cDamn right, papist bottom,\u201d she retorted. She stubbed out her cigarette and lit another one.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cNow, now,\u201d Elowen interjected, turning to Ironbell. \u201cInspector, let me bring you up to speed.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n Ironbell nodded.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cIt\u2019s the Goblins,\u201d she said. \u201cThey\u2019ve kidnapped Princess Tolymundy and have sent a list of demands.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cI see,\u201d Ironbell said. \u201cTolymundy is your second eldest daughter, isn\u2019t she?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cCorrect,\u201d Elowen said, a rim of tears appearing around her otherwise sparkling blue eyes. \u201cIf they harm her, I will have no option but to wage war.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cCould you not accede to their demands?\u201d Ironbell asked.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cI say,\u201d Clarke spluttered. \u201cThe spike-heads sent a twenty-page list of demands, ranging from the right of droit-du-seigneur over every maiden in the kingdom, to a free supply of Jin\u2019s Chow Mein Welsh-cakes.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cYeah, not gonna happen, bucko,\u201d Jin snarled through a cloud of smoke. \u201cNo-one is gonna droit this maiden.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cI think I may have an answer,\u201d the Inspector said. \u201cI need a camel, a train ticket to Manchester, and a complete set of Jonathan Price\u2019s war poems.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n The Queen gasped, \u201cYou\u2019re not going to\u2026 I mean, you can\u2019t. Not even I would dare\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cI can and I must,\u201d Ironbell said, while picking out a Bakewell from the tin. \u201cHmmm very nice.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cYou knows it,\u201d Jin said, winking.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cDo we get retribution afterwards?\u201d Elowen asked.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Despite reservations about placing \u201cElowen\u201d and \u201cRetribution\u201d in the same sentence, Ironbell agreed. \u201cJust tone down the fireworks.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n The queen just smiled.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" He swept into the room as if he owned it; every head turning as he strode across the parquet flooring, his heels clicking. Even Queen Elowen Lumina looked up from the sheaf of demands she was studying. \u201cThis is,\u201d she started to say, \u2018this is a meeting of the Royal Council to which only members […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"rop_custom_images_group":[],"rop_custom_messages_group":[],"rop_publish_now":"yes","rop_publish_now_accounts":{"facebook_10158782359051062_103813597863211":"","twitter_1225722811282530305_1225722811282530305":""},"rop_publish_now_history":[],"rop_publish_now_status":"pending","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[1490,1518],"tags":[1517,1515,1512,1514,8,441,7,20,1511,1510,1513,9,14,118,1516],"class_list":["post-2308","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-1490","category-february-2025-rescue","tag-across","tag-am","tag-clarke","tag-elowen","tag-he","tag-head","tag-her","tag-his","tag-inspector","tag-ironbell","tag-jin","tag-said","tag-she","tag-they","tag-turning"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/pbrNJE-Be","jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"post_mailing_queue_ids":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.swanseawriterscircle.co.uk\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2308","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.swanseawriterscircle.co.uk\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.swanseawriterscircle.co.uk\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.swanseawriterscircle.co.uk\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.swanseawriterscircle.co.uk\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=2308"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/www.swanseawriterscircle.co.uk\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2308\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":2309,"href":"https:\/\/www.swanseawriterscircle.co.uk\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2308\/revisions\/2309"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.swanseawriterscircle.co.uk\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=2308"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.swanseawriterscircle.co.uk\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=2308"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.swanseawriterscircle.co.uk\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=2308"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}