The nurse scans my vitals, and performs a daily blood pressure check; together we scrutinize my\u00a0 skin for abrasions, rashes, – anything that looks out of the ordinary. People remark its repetitive, beginning the day this way, but it’s nothing compared to the monotonous existence I inhabited before the trial. Pain and disability has a way of souring life.\u00a0 It’s like having to drink your tea cold all the time. <\/p>\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n
I’m buddied\nup with Deidre.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
‘I’m paranoid\nabout burning myself again’. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
‘Just stay\naway from flames, it shouldn’t be that hard’<\/p>\n\n\n\n
‘I can’t\nreally avoid cooking. I’m terrified every time I go near the stove’ <\/p>\n\n\n\n
I\u2019ve had several serious accidents myself. Last month I fell\noff my bike and fractured my ankle, but it was 3 days before I noticed\nsomething was wrong. My gait had become strange. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
‘Why didn’t\nyou come into A and E sooner?’<\/p>\n\n\n\n
‘It\u2019s a long\nstory, I’m on a medical trial. I’ve had my brain stimulated so I can’t feel\npain. I can do anything now. I can run, I can swim, I can fly a plane if want\nto’. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
“Well\nyou won’t be running any more, you may well have sustained permanent damage’<\/p>\n\n\n\n
The\nconsultant’s right, I’ve compromised my foot but it’s worth the hassle. Instead of my body being an obstacle it\u2019s\nfinally the vehicle it was always supposed to be. When I tell Deidre she is disapproving.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
‘At the rate you’re going you’ll sustain an\ninjury every 3 months. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
‘Do you\nseriously want to go back to the way you were?’<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Deidre had\nMS, she could barely walk either. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
‘At least I\ncould tell when there was something wrong. Look what happened to John, and\nMelanie’. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
John was\nanother patient on the trial who recently died. He’d been struck on the head by\na falling object and died. Melanie had a similar accident and was in a coma. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
‘You know\nI’ve made a decision. I’m going to ask for a reversal’<\/p>\n\n\n\n
‘You want to\ngo back to the way you were, Deidre?’<\/p>\n\n\n\n
‘Yes, don’t\nyou?’<\/p>\n\n\n\n
‘No’<\/p>\n\n\n\n
‘Even if it\nmeans dying younger because because you’ve can’t tell you’re sick or injured?’<\/p>\n\n\n\n
‘No’<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Silence\nengulfs us whilst Deidre stirs her coffee. <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
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